two woman on first date

First Date Tarot Spread - A 9 Card Tarot Reading

Last Updated: October 2, 2023

Breaking up is never easy. It can leave us feeling heartbroken, lost, and unsure of what to do next. It might have been your decision, or it was a decision that was made for you. Either way, the end of a relationship can be a challenging and emotional time.

Tarot is here to help you navigate through this challenging period and can provide guidance or clarity during these difficult times. These 8 break up tarot spreads will guide you towards healing, moving on, and making important decisions with clarity and strength.

Table of Contents

Card layout and questions to ask

To begin, shuffle your deck and draw a card for each position as shown in the layout below

Finally, take some time to reflect on the questions that each card position represents and what message the tarot cards in that position might be trying to tell you.

If you’re just starting to learn tarot, or if you’re still getting to know your deck, you may find my in-depth articles on the meanings of every tarot card helpful.

first date tarot spread

Card #1: What should we talk about?

This card can help identify topics that would foster genuine connection and mutual interest. It’ll be perfect to randomly suggest when the conversation isn’t flowing as well as you’d hoped! It might reveal shared hobbies, values, or aspirations that can make the conversation flow easily and create a bond between both of you.

  Card Pull Example:

Discussing positive experiences, aspirations, and joyful memories can promote a warm and friendly atmosphere between you both. This is a time to share what makes you happy, and learn about each other’s sources of joy outside of relationships.

Avoid dwelling on past disappointments or regrets or any painfully inflammatory posts you’ve accidentally sent each other in the run up to meeting. Instead, steer the conversation towards present interests and future possibilities to keep the mood light and forward-focused. This card could also mean maybe don’t bring up things that have peed you off in the past? That can wait til a later time.

Card #2: What should be avoided discussing?

This card provides guidance on which topics might be sensitive or inappropriate for a first date. It can help avoid unnecessary conflict or discomfort by steering the conversation away from potentially divisive or overly personal subjects. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t talk about these important topics – it just means right now, for a first date, this isn’t the time.

Card Pull Example:

It might be best to avoid generally discussing work in detail, focusing instead on more personal and varied topics to get to know each other better.

Avoid discussing past traumas or drastic life changes you suddenly or often make. Such topics can be too heavy, and personal for a first date, and may give the vibe you’re not serious about dating.

Card #3: How will I know the date is going well?

This card gives insights into the signs and signals that indicate mutual interest and enjoyment. It might point towards body language, conversation flow, or a feeling of comfort and ease as indicators of a successful date.

Card Pull Example:

Mutual understanding, shared laughter, and a sense of connection indicate that the date is going well. Embrace it hun! You’ll know you’re having a great time with this person because it feels like a special connection.

If there is an atmosphere of anxiety, worry, or discomfort, it might indicate that the date isn’t going as well as hoped. Don’t take these sorts of moments personally, as we never really know what someone is going through, but be open to holding space for them to share without judgement, you can also offer to listen to venting or to offer advice, but don’t offer advice without an invitation.

Card #4: How will I know this is a good match?

This card offers perspective on the compatibility between both of you. It may reveal shared values, complementary personalities, or mutual attraction as signs of a promising connection.

Card Pull Example:

Mutual attraction, shared values, and a sense of unity are good signs of compatibility.

This is some feisty energy! If there are signs of underlying tension or competitive behavior, it might indicate a lack of harmony and compatibility. It’s up to you if you want to have that sort of edge in your dates together. Alternatively, it may indicate that they are open to seeing more than yourself, and you’ll be having to vie for their attention – so think about this too, and ask them candidly about it!

Card #5: How to feel less nervous about the date?

This card provides advice on calming nerves and building confidence. It might suggest mental exercises, focusing on positive aspects, or adopting a more relaxed and open mindset to ease anxiety.

Card Pull Example:

Get on your bed before leaving, and just take a few minutes. Whether it’s closed eye time, or a break from any screens or thinking… Take a few moments of quiet reflection and relaxation before the date to calm your nerves.

Avoid overthinking or imagining worst-case scenarios. Focus on the present moment and release self-imposed barriers. Lean on facts, and if you have a friend who is really good at hyping you up to overcome any self-doubts, now is the time to call on them!

Card #6: How to feel more empowered about the date?

This placement offers guidance on building self-assurance and feeling in control of the dating experience. It might recommend setting healthy boundaries, being authentic, or focusing on personal strengths to foster empowerment.

Card Pull Example:

Embrace your own worth and uniqueness. Be playful, creative, sensual, and enjoy the experience of sharing your true self.

Release any dependencies or insecurities – have a proper “Not today, Satan!” moment with yourself. Stand in your own power, and don’t let past negative patterns hold you back.

Card #7: Something about them that I should get excited about

This card highlights a positive trait or aspect of your date that can spark enthusiasm and anticipation. It may reveal a shared interest, an admirable quality, or a unique characteristic that makes the date more exciting. This is fun!

Card Pull Example:

Get excited about their passion, enthusiasm, and creative energy. Talk about travel, what that means for a relationship – or big projects you like to take on! This can indicate a lively and inspiring connection.

They may have recently overcome a period of dissatisfaction or stagnation, which could make the date feel more meaningful and rewarding, so don’t be afraid to ask what they’re like when they get bored in life – and how do they handle it. It may be just what you need, or it could be a potential challenge for you.

Card #8: Something that I need to know about this date

This card uncovers crucial information or insights that can influence the interaction. It might bring to light expectations, intentions, or circumstances that are important to be aware of for a smoother and more informed dating experience. This doesn’t mean that some cards you pull will be like “run 10 miles in the other direction” but more a heads up about what’s different between you both, and only you can see what that would mean.

Card Pull Example:

This date could be a turning point or bring unexpected opportunities. Be open to surprises and go with the flow. This person could bring you something you’ve been waiting for.

Be mindful of misunderstandings, or miscommunications. Clear and honest dialogue is essential.

Card #9: What will be the outcome of meeting this person?

This card provides a glimpse into the potential future dynamics between both individuals. It might indicate whether the relationship will develop into friendship, romance, or simply a learning experience, helping set realistic expectations. If you’re gonna wanna pull any card, this will be it – just know that you have full autonomy and full willpower, so this is a suggestion outcome only.

Card Pull Example:

This meeting has the potential to lead to happiness, emotional fulfillment, and possibly a long-lasting relationship. A very positive outcome for you both!

There may be some challenges to overcome, potentially some unresolved trauma that could impact future dates, but these can all lead to growth and learning, even if the relationship doesn’t develop further.

Try this first date tarot reading below - Pull 9 cards now

Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Sun card

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Empress card

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The High-Priestess card

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Lovers card

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Magician card

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Hierophant card

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Devil card

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Hanged Man

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Backyard Banshee Tarot Deck Back Card
The Chariot card

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Shuffle the cards

More tarot spreads for you to try ✨

This page is part of our collection of free tarot spread layouts. If you enjoyed the read, then you’ll love the following articles.